31 mars 2007
A new experienceI haven't slept for 24 hours, and it doesn't feel good not sleeping in on a weekend. But this weekend's a pretty unique one, because it's the first time I actually spent my night in school. Sipping my Coke Cola which I got from Macdonalds delivery, and enjoying a quiet moment all to myself, the familiar place which I have been seeing practically everyday since almost a year ago suddenly seemed a little unfamiliar. Gone are the rushing people, gone are the noisy energetic students and gone are the bright surroundings of the place. Now, as I sit isolated outside the Orchestra room with barely a gleam of light, I feel a sense of solitude, yet not the negative type. It just seemed quiet, but yet so peaceful and soothing. The darkness made the entire place even more alluring, as if the school mysteriously transformed itself into a magical realm, of everything else it usually is not.
I feel so sleepy after having stayed awake for more than a day. Can barely keep my eyes open long enough before I doze off now and then. Even the caffeine in the Cola isn't helping. In fact, it seemed to have been prescribed with a drowsy formula, for every mouth of Cola I sip, the more I feel as if my body has been zapped of all energy and that it's time to rest. I wonder how am I to stay awake till 5pm today to "supervise" the Orchestra's SYF preparations. Yet at the same time, I am definitely grateful for the fact that as the teacher, I simply have to sit and observe, unlike the students who have to trudge on, no matter how tired they are. But hey, they got to sleep inside the Orchestra room! Oh well, guess I would still prefer to be the teacher, hehe.
Getting a little too sleepy to be able to make sense of what I am blogging about. Guess I should stop the incoherant entry for now, and perhaps just hope the caffeine in the Cola does wonder.
5:55 AM。。。書いていました。
27 mars 2007
Sick of itI wonder why can't I just be left alone. Stop prying into my life, it's utterly boring.
好像荡秋千，荡到脑震荡，什么都不记得，什么都不知道。。。
6:41 PM。。。書いていました。
26 mars 2007
Updates updates!Yet another week has breezed past. Can't believe it's already the second week of Term 2, which means another 8 more weeks till the June holidays, total yayness!
Sports Nite was held on last Friday night in school, and it was quite an eye opener for a first timer like me. Didn't expect face painting, fire torching and mascots in a normal school sportsday, but well, now I know, haha!
But it was quite a spoiler when the sky looked like it was going to rain, and the remaining sports events were postponed to THIS Friday morning. Lucky though, they have decided to CANCEL the teachers' race, meaning I don't have to run anymore. Total yayness again! Hahaha. I looked and felt so damn weird in sports attire. Bah, give me jeans and tees anytime!
Weekends was kind of boring though. Plans were cancelled and the entire weekend seemed disrupted. Only plus point was being able to sleep in and catch up on sleep.
And then before I know it, today's Monday already. How time flies... I can't believe next Monday is the very very important day.
7:40 PM。。。書いていました。
22 mars 2007
Porridge frenzySuddenly felt as if I hadn't eaten porridge for ages and got my mom to cook me some. Before I knew it, I finished two bowls. Guess I really missed porridge a lot!
9:57 PM。。。書いていました。
19 mars 2007
First day of school...Was super tiring!
Almost couldn't wake myself up for work, and it felt dreadful having to wake up at 6am again during the weekdays.
The walk to school from the MRT station was like twice the normal distance.
Lessons were okay, except everyone seemed a tad too noisy today. Busy planning lessons and doing PPT slides today. Felt as if I was a working machine, and simply worked my way till like 7+ in the evening before I set off for home.
I am so tired!
Can't wait for the June holidays.
8:23 PM。。。書いていました。
17 mars 2007
Making choicesI have come to realised some time back that many a times, we do not get to make decisions or choices, even when it is our lives. We can't decide our names, we can't decide our looks, we can't decide who our parents are, we can't decide who we shall meet and not meet. Many things in life seemed to have been decided for us, even before we had the chance to decide for ourselves.
There are too many limitations in life, that even before we decide, choices have already been forcefully made and reinforced on us. Hence, I guess I am just glad when I get to make my own decisions and choices. My choice might not have been the best one, or the outcome could have been horribly bad. Yet, I am just happy enough to be given a chance to decide for myself, and even when it turns out to be a bad decision, at least I am proud to say I had a choice, and if I get to choose again, I would still opt it this way. The exterior casing is just a facade. If no one sees the true content within, what good would the object be?
Anyway, it's already Friday of the March holidays. It hasn't seemed like a holiday since I am still in school everyday, but at least I am thankful for being able to wake up slightly later the past few days. Met up with an old friend after work today. Caught a movie, 300. Spartans vs Persians. Freedom vs slavery. It was a pretty inspiring movie, and the choreography was excellent. The washed out effects, the use of black and white, the movie was great on the whole, lest for some overly violent scenes. After the movie, we simply hang around Ang Mo Kio, reminiscing the Ang Mo Kio we knew and frequent back then, and the new Ang Mo Kio it is today. So many things have changed, so many buildings and shops have retreated to the back of our memories. So many things have ceased to exist in reality, so many people we knew of no longer exist in our circle of trust. We simply walked up and down till we were tired, and ended up in the new Macdonalds in Ang Mo Kio Park. Had a long nice chat there, updating each other with bits and pieces of our lives. Shared stories and anecdotes of common friends, I whined about my job, ranted about my unhappiness towards certain events and he simply listened. It was therapeutic, having a good listening ear, having a good friend to pour your woes to. It felt like the good old times, when we were still studying, when everything was simple and carefree.
Then I guess we got kind of crazy and decided to head down to East Coast Park just because we hadn't been there for ages. It was a little crazy but super fun doing impromptu stuff, following our hearts. We strolled around ECP for a couple of hours, chatting, crapping and doing lame stuff, like making fun of the people we saw, cracking dumb jokes and gossiping about our friends. Stayed till like we were all deadbeat and decided to head home. And being the very obedient citizens we are, or rather the overly-enthusiastic citizens, we actually drove ourselves to a police road block and got checked before heading home. Haha. All in all, it was really nice to just chill the Friday away and enjoy the night.
After meeting up with my friend, suddenly had this thought... there are some people in life who simply pass by, leaves some memories and leave again, while there are those who will always be lingering around, creating happier memories to cover the sad ones.
Guess this super long entry should suffice for the lack of entries recently. Time to finally head off for bed, and to hopefully wake up for a better day.
3:53 AM。。。書いていました。
14 mars 2007
七年之痒The blog title best describes my mood. I have decided to succumb to my itchy brains, and hopefully I won't regret the decision. Else, think I might have to bear with the consequences for at least six months before things get better.
Haha, come what may!
10:26 PM。。。書いていました。
12 mars 2007
Random happy eventHappiest event of the day: eating tutu kueh.
Such simple acts/things makes me very happy.
11:32 PM。。。書いていました。
06 mars 2007
今年。。。好像好多事情都变了。
不知道为什么自己总是忙忙碌碌，却总有人觉得我只不过在浑浑噩噩。
一直觉得透不过气，一直觉得无所适从。
找不到任何认同，找不到任何肯定。有的，只是一大堆的猜疑，误解，冲突。
无法好好享受，无法好好去喜欢这份工作。
只知道工作从早到晚不间断，只知道无时无刻都在牵挂未完成的工作，责任，任务。
无法好好松懈，无法尽情去放逐自己，让自己快乐。
我需要充电，去找回失去的一切。
但是，失去之后，又何必再找回呢？
11:36 PM。。。書いていました。
02 mars 2007
UpdatesWorked myself silly for the past few days, clearing all my markings and calculating the results for my students. Finally cleared everything and I feel so relieved. Surprisingly though, it was kind of therapeutic to just immerse myself in work and not be bothered with anything else. Still, that doesn't make me a workaholic. Shopaholic, yes I admit I am, but workaholic, nope!
After all these, I am basically going to slack a bit in work for the next few days, since it's E-learning week for the boys from next Monday - Wednesday. Need to report to school before 0730 on Monday, and 0900 on Tuesday and Wednesday. And the best part of it all? I get to go home at 1230! Yayness! After which, it's about 2 more days of lessons, and then the long awaited March holidays! I need a good break during the March holidays. Maybe I shall go for a massive shopping spree, or maybe I shall just lock myself up at home and go into retreat. Need some time for myself to clear the head and rid the body of all evil/ silly/ dumb/ irritating thoughts of work, life and everything else.
And just as I thought I could finally take a breather with the weekends around the corner, I had to fall sick AGAIN. Seriously, I have already lost count of the times I have been falling sick this year. Even colleagues also mentioned that I always succumb to another bout of virus before I recover fully from one. This time round though, it seems a little more severe. A stronger strain of gastric flu it seems, no wonder my head felt like Mount Everest, my nose felt like the Niagara Falls and yet my throat felt like the scorching Sahara Desert. And it sure doesn't help that whatever I eat gets flushed out almost instantaneously, that I can't really be bothered with eating my meals anymore. And to top it off, Fridays are the heaviest day of the week for me. It took me so much to not flare up in class. (else I suspect my mood indicator will probably rant about it in his blog, haha!) Thank goodness I cleared my work fast and went home early to get some rest.
Basically, that is what has been happening in my life. Boring and mundane routine. But at least there's more to look forward to with the closure of CA1 and the arrival of the March holidays. Shall go get myself crazy during the holidays and enjoy till I drop. Of course though, I better recover asap.
7:12 PM。。。書いていました。
